"The USA Today" and Dan Brown deserve each other

I do not intend to read Dan Brown's new novel. I DID read The DaVinci Code because the entire world would simply not shut UP about it ever ever ever, and I completely hated each individual page.

Because I am a very petty man, I was incredibly delighted to find my rubbernecked reading of "The USA Today"'s, uh... words... about Brown's latest justified by the gift of the following exquisite sentences:

Langdon is a professor of "symbology." (Brown says there's no such academic field. "The closest is symbiotics.")

If there were such a thing as "symbiotics", I assume it would actually be the study of the lucrative synergy between hack lowbrow novelists and remedial newspapers written by and for the lexically challenged.